Fall, a season of change, a time to change the clocks and “fall back”, the only time of the year I would be found hanging out a banana costume to dry. This fall I am transitioning back into a life I once knew, a life where my husband spent most of his waking hours on site at a job. I am at home, roadschooling and caring for the typical family needs consisting of laundry, cleaning, shopping and cooking. I am reminded for a few months of the life I use to live.
I don’t miss my old way of life where the man I married left me each day to work, I spent two hours of my day driving my kids to and from school, attended school/sport activities and volunteered like a crazy woman. My family met between the hours of 6 and 9:30pm, aka bedtime. I killed myself trying to be the perfect woman; clean house, great meals, classroom mom volunteer, and volunteer coordinator of a new church, while trying to connect with other women in the community. Of course, I added on at least one project at home to show how really awesome I was! I kept up the appearance of happiness, I had that disguise mastered.
My old life meant disconnection from myself and my family, it meant busyness, chores, and meeting outside expectations and demands. It meant keeping up an appearance, energy being sucked right out of my essence, and I was becoming sicker by the day. I was not thriving in my old way of life.
This new life is about making “enough” money to get by, to put energy in living in today, sharing my life with my love and the children I chose to have. This new life is about simplicity, replacing my plans for the next better house, newer car, boat, and Caribbean vacation with spending time with my family in daily life. My new life is in no way the perfect life, it is messy, and it is real. The beauty is, so am I.
Weekly Challenge “Letting Go of the Old Way”
- I remember how I use to believe..
- Today I believe this to be..
- I desire to spend more energy..
I am thriving in my life.
(I am treading water) 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 (I am living and shining)
This Week’s Challenge:
1. As the season of fall encompasses nature, you too are invited to let go with the leaves. Journal about one belief/behavior/way of thinking you desire to let go of this season. Then, let it go.